Photos, from the top; Emma obliges for a picture at last, and top right, baby carrier South African style,
Below: James and I, and Shelley all smiles
I have been doing a bit of "reflection" myself, and have decided that I was probably on the edge of burnout, just before our holiday. I was SO tired and irritable, and had lost my joy, though it was hard to admit it out loud. Yes, I do have a lot to do, with the children, a baby, house work, meals etc, but I think it is more than that.
I have realised that when I go "ahead" of myself with the homeschooling, and start fretting about the next Grade, the next book (and everything for that matter,) I leave the Lord out of it, and everything crumbles and crashes down. That endless fascination with Homeschool catalogs... it shows up an element of mistrust in the Lord. As long as I keep "researching" the newest curriculum I hear of, doubting myself and what we are doing, and asking other people their opinion about my childrens performance, I am not really fully trusting the Lord for His plan for us. Sure, advice is helpful at times. But if I have not really gone and "seeked" the Lord about something, before I discuss it with a friend, I've left Him out, and missed a valuable opportunity to place this area into His hands. I cut Him out, and do not act in His will in this area, because I did not care to put it at His feet.
I think back to when I first started reading up about homeschooling and how some authors really put a lot of emphasis on prayer and our personal walk, more than on curriculum choice and teaching styles. I now realise that is so, so very wise.
I know it is Gods' will that we homeschool and follow this lifestyle, despite its' challenges. But I am I prepared to actually give my ideals and aspirations for my family over to Him, and begin to be molded into His plan? It's a day to day choice, not a once off decision.
I have been getting a Daily Focus e-mail (see top corner banner) It is so encouraging. Everyday, I get an e mail in my Inbox, and it re-directs my thoughts to the real reason we homeschool. So often it has addressed an area of concern and put to rest needless anxiety. I am beginning to understand how much of an instrument I really am in this...